Det er hemmeligheden ved livet: erstat en bekymring med en anden.
Det er ikke nok, at der er grønt lys - man skal også bevæge fusserne.
Det havde været meget lettere at blive voksen, hvis vores forældre ikke havde begået så mange fejl, som de nu vil skåne os for!
En god uddannelse er det næstbedste efter en emsig moder.
Ingen byrde er tungere end store evner.
Ingen bør gå i skole eller på arbejde eller i hundene, uden at der er nogen til at kysse farvel!
Ingen mand ville blive inviteret så ofte til middag, som Jesus blev, med mindre han var interessant og havde humor.
Intet problem er så stort eller kompliceret, at man ikke kan løbe fra det!
Jeg elsker menneskeheden, det er folk, jeg ikke kan fordrage.
Jeg har udviklet en ny filosofi. Jeg gruer kun for én dag ad gangen.
Livet er som en cykel med ti gear. De fleste af os har gear, som vi aldrig bruger.
Lov aldrig din mave en syltetøjsmad, før du er sikker på, at der er noget syltetøj!
Lykke er lige så meget at kunne lide, hvad du gør, som at gøre, hvad du kan lide.
Sommetider ligger jeg vågen om natten og spørger "Hvorfor mig?". Så svarer en stemme "Ikke noget personligt, men dit navn dukkede bare op".
Sommetider ligger jeg vågen om natten og spørger, "Hvad har jeg gjort forkert?" Så svarer en stemme mig "dette vil komme til at tage mere end bare én nat".
A good education is the next best thing to a pushy mother.
Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It's already tomorrow in Australia.
Happiness is liking what you do as well as doing what you like.
I love mankind; it's people I can't stand.
It's hard to brave when you're only a very small animal. I've developed a new philosophy... I only dread one day at a time.
Jogging is very beneficial. It's good for your legs and your feet. It's also very good for the ground. It makes it feel needed.
Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed.
My life has no purpose, no direction, no aim, no meaning, and yet I'm happy. I can't figure it out. What am I doing right?
Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love.
Once you're over the hill, you begin to pick up speed. Rivers know this: there is no hurry. We shall get there some day.
Sometimes I lie awake at night and ask "Why me?" Then a voice answers "Nothing personal, your name just happened to come up".
Sometimes I like awake at night and ask, "what have I done wrong?" Then a voice says to me, "this is going to take more than one night."
Sometimes when I get up in the morning, I feel very peculiar. I feel like I've just got to bite a cat! I feel like if I don't bite a cat before sundown, I'll go crazy! But then I just take a deep breath and forget about it. That's what's known as real mat.
That's the secret to life... replace one worry with another....
They're funny things, Accidents. You never have them till you're having them.
Try not to have a good time...this is supposed to be educational.
When you fall on somebody, it's not enough to say you didn't mean to, after all, he probably didn't mean to be underneath you.
Yesterday I was a dog. Today I'm a dog. Tomorrow I'll probably still be a dog. Sigh! There's so little hope for advancement.
You can't help repecting anybody who can spell Tuesday, even if he doesn't spell it right, but spelling isn't anything. There are days when spelling simply doesn't count